The Big WaveMonday, January 28, 2013
How does it feel to become a surfer? I wonder.
Looking at the waves, I always ask myself how one can balance knowing that the board will be slippery and the waves will be surely crashing towards your feet. When they arise, one's initial reaction (especially of a not so adventurous person like me) might be of fright. How much we wanted to try surfing and surpass the waves, we can't help but hold back for a second and worry that it might eat us alive. It's troublesome and no one wants to get into such mess.
But one way or another, a little flame of courage will always be there sitting at the bottom of our hearts that might lead us to push ourselves to our limits and give it a try. Hence, I tried. I tried surfing on a big wave – not really the one which surfers love to surf through though, but something similar – a big wave of life.
Our lives are like a collection of waves, big and small. But more often than not, we are awaken by those which are of greater heights – big, tremendous, humongous waves. In my 20 years of existence, it's as of the moment that I've been confronted by the biggest wave of my life relative to the other waves which I have encountered. It's the wave that would affect the entirety of who I am today and in the years to come. It is a mind-blowing, gut-turning, and ego-crashing wave to be exact for it will test you and your ability to manage your tasks, compromise, accept downsides, and still remind yourself to get moving.
This is the wave that I'm going through right now. It's slippery on board and, a lot of times, waves crash my feet making me unstable.There are times when I fall but thanks to this optimism in my system – so much optimism that I can't find anything wrong with everything that's happening to my life right now – I don't give failure a chance to bring me down.
Ironically, this big, killer wave I am surfing through is the same wave that keeps me alive; Alive in a sense that this is the only wave that would fulfill my sense of purpose. Oh, here we go again with the sense of purpose! But it is true. How much you try, you can't hide the fact that what pushes you to get on moving is the purpose you wanted all along. Whatever it takes, even if you stumble, even if you get hurt, if you know where you want to go, where you want your life's direction to be... you'll be going for it! – that big wave. This flame that I have right now in my heart... I am being reminded by that same inner flame to get up and surf again. :)
I realized that I've gotten stronger, fearless, and pretty much cool with the wave. For some reasons, this wave I've gotten myself into has become a little smaller; or maybe I have perceived it that way. Just like any other surfer who has the willingness to surf over and over again despite the fear of drowning or being turned upside down by the big waves, I have learned to balance myself and just go with the flow – be in-sync with the energy of the water, ride it, feel it, and be one with it.
Hence, try and do not be worried. If you must fail, accept it. From there, learn and be wiser.