Two good friends and I had a talk a couple of days ago about my hobby for blogging. Apparently Friend 1 while browsing my phone, saw the draft for my October 4 (Title: Where is my path?) post. I was astounded when he started reading the first word aloud but I immediately let him read the rest silently. After all, I had published it online before he got to read it… why bother to hide the draft? So after that, I believe he was able to see right through me and my inner thoughts… he suddenly commented that he got affected and felt the same sentiment as I had in my draft.
Friend 2 heard us talking then asked me “Sentiments? All I read about in your blog are trivial things… what sentiments do you mean?”
That made me think.
Compared to my style in 2004, my posts have become quite superficial these days — emotions & deep thoughts aside. One way or another I kinda miss how I used to blog.
Moreover, I miss how people would read a blog because it’s about your life. I miss how everyone reached out for one another, not bounded by website gimmicks aka giveaways or whatnot, not inclined to unique hits, page ranks, nor web popularity.
I must admit that when I went back to blog again in 2008, I had a difficult time adjusting. I know it shouldn’t be that way right? I mean, I don’t need to adjust if I wanted a real personal blog which would basically be all about me. Nothing to be pressured about if I wanted to stay real! But there are just times that what surrounds you become so overwhelming that you can’t help but try to compensate and be with the rest. Plus almost every blogger I knew of became inactive, making me a part of a cluster of new-generation bloggers.
No, I have nothing against the new blog-o-sphere. In fact, I eventually learned to adapt to the new drill — on how make-up and outfits go hand in hand in every entry, how food reviews can attract eyes and gut, and how sponsors can help every blogger out there.. I even got myself a lookbook account for Pete’s sake! I actually like that kind of blogging, and I believe I will continue that still. However, it’s never satisfactory for my taste. It’s not enough ‘coz, indeed, I’m more of the personal blogger — a blogger who would share more of her thoughts & emotions, of her realizations & aspirations. Basically, a blogger who would share her story.
What I just want to point out is, I miss sharing how I think, how I see things, and how I struggle and find ways to go on with life. It’s the personal connection that I miss. Maybe now and again, nevertheless, I’d share a few words about who I really am and what I really think and contact my “inner self”. A blog, for me, is still an online diary after all; hence, I will continue it until God knows when.